Coaching, consulting and mentoring: what's the difference?

When an executive starts looking for support in their development, three words come up: coaching, consulting and mentoring. All three are valuable, but they are not the same thing. Knowing which one you need is the first step towards finding the right support.

I work both as a coach and as a marketing consultant. That is why I have to keep this distinction very clear, not only as a definition but in my everyday practice.

What is coaching?

The International Coaching Federation (ICF) defines coaching as partnering with clients in a thought-provoking and creative process that inspires them to maximise their personal and professional potential.

The key word in this definition is “partnering”. The coach does not draw a path for the person being coached. The person being coached brings the agenda; through questions, observations and different perspectives, the coach accompanies them in deepening their own thinking.

The ICF Core Competency Model describes this stance clearly too. According to the model, the coach recognises that the person being coached is responsible for their own choices. In coaching, the decision always belongs to the person being coached.

What is consulting?

In consulting, the consultant analyses the situation based on their expertise and experience, shares their view and makes recommendations. What is expected from consulting is often an answer: a strategy, a plan, a proposed solution.

When I work as a marketing consultant, this is exactly what I do: I look at the brand’s situation, state my view clearly and recommend a way forward. In coaching, I don’t. So that the two roles don’t blur, when we work with the same organisation in both areas, I make clear from the start which role I am in.

The ICF Core Competencies also expect the coach to know and maintain the differences and boundaries between coaching, consulting and similar disciplines. This distinction is part of coaching’s ethical framework.

What is mentoring?

Mentoring is a relationship in which an experienced person shares their career experience with someone less experienced. The mentor passes on their experience, opens doors and shows the way, as someone who can say, “I’ve walked this path.”

In mentoring, the focus is often on the mentor’s experience. In coaching, the focus is not on the coach’s experience, but on the thinking, values and choices of the person being coached.

Side by side

• In coaching, questions are asked; the person being coached finds the answer.
• In consulting, analysis is done; the consultant recommends the answer.
• In mentoring, experience is shared; the mentor offers examples from their own path.

The three are not mutually exclusive; a good consultant or mentor can also make room for thinking together. The difference lies in who holds the direction and the decision. An executive might, in the same period, receive career advice from a mentor, work on strategy for their organisation with a consultant and reflect on their own leadership with a coach. What matters is knowing what you expect from each relationship.

Which one do you need?

You might ask yourself:

• Do I need an expert view and a ready solution on a specific issue? Consulting may be the better fit.
• Do I want to hear the experience of someone who has walked a similar path? Mentoring may help.
• Do I want to clarify my own thinking, see my options and make my own decision? That is exactly what coaching is for.

What makes coaching different

To me, the most valuable side of coaching is that the answer does not come from outside. A consultant or a mentor may give you a good answer, but that answer comes from their experience. In coaching, the answer you reach is your own; it grows out of your values, your context and your choices.

This does not mean the coach is passive. A good coach listens closely, shares what they notice and asks challenging questions. But the direction is always set by the person being coached.

In short, coaching, consulting and mentoring are three different relationships with three different sets of expectations. Knowing which one to choose helps you make the most of the support you receive.

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